Being Good is Not Your Default State

Misconception Month – Good, not Apathetic. An article about the common, incorrect belief that we’re great people, and that it takes effort to be bad.

It’s comforting to believe that you’re a good person. We all do it. We’ve wired ourselves to not really think about how we perceive morality and where we stand on our own scale of judgment.

The scale is often freely applied to other people and events, but a ton of people forget to look inwards first. It’s not really their fault. It’s just conditioning and a byproduct of our societal obsession with winning and being right. Continue reading “Being Good is Not Your Default State”

What You Do Is Not Easy

Misconception Month – Intensive, not Easy. An article about disparaging ourselves, and giving yourself a little more credit for all the things you do.

“Even a monkey could do it.” Have you ever heard that line? It’s used to indicate how easy a job is. Often, an unfulfilled employee will say it about their own profile. It’s not a very encouraging phrase.

However, what you do requires effort. A monkey cannot do it. If you think about it for a moment, you will realize how absurd that is. And then you will realize the absurdity of other negative statements we make.

The things that you do are not easy, they’re intensive. They take training and patience and fortitude to do. So why is it that it’s so easy for us to think otherwise? Continue reading “What You Do Is Not Easy”

You Do Not Want To Be Happy

Misconception Month – Happy, not Comfortable. An article about the most common lie ever told, and how we choose not to be more because of comfort.

At least eight out of ten people will say yes to the question, “Do you want to be happy?” It is the biggest and most common lie we all participate in. It’s an ingrained part of our culture to treat happiness as the ultimate goal – it’s the inherent marketing that people and companies alike peddle.

Continue reading “You Do Not Want To Be Happy”

The Key to Success is Not Competence, but Persistence

Misconception Month – Persistence, not Competence. An article about how the dangers of talent and how persistence leads to a better, sustainable success.

The unholy obsession that we as a people have with genius, competence, and ‘natural talent’ is a toxic mess. We often don’t realize it. It’s an ingrained part of our culture (or at least, across popular and easily accessible cultures) to emphasize talent in children as a focal point of their worth.

We appreciate children for being talented, but there are pitfalls in that appreciation that we disregard. As adults, our praise is conditional. We mean to say that children are well-formed or skilled FOR THEIR AGE. But a child cannot possibly make that distinction. Continue reading “The Key to Success is Not Competence, but Persistence”

Back with a New Look

Hello, hello, and welcome back! The hiatus is unofficially over – I’m figuring out how to approach a new writing schedule. However I’ve done one of the things I wanted to do – I’ve created a new theme for the blog. Based on WordPress’s 2016 theme, I’ve designed this one myself.

I would be proud of it, but every now and then I change something, and that’s where you come in. I would love your thoughts and feedback on this new theme – how it looks on your phone and computer, and if you have any ideas. Do you like the fonts? Is the site sufficiently color-themed? Does it have too much color? Is it accessible i.e. are you able to use it well? Is the Sidebar distracting? Is it useful?

Help me make this look better.

Now that I have this out of the way, I can finally focus on what I want to write about. I have lots of ideas for recurring series – some of the old ones will come back, and some new ones shall surface.

If you’ve been through the Library, do you have any particular content you enjoy?

Comment below, and see you again soon!

Standing Still – 4 Warning Signs To Beware

Appreciating 2016-03-07 – Talking about the feeling of standing still, laziness, progress, and needing to constantly motivate yourself.

Have you ever worked from home while your family or roommates are out daily? Have you ever lived alone? If yes, chances are that at some point, you’ve felt like you’re standing still.

In a pressure-driven society, it’s impossible to be comfortable with standing still. We’re always pushed to make progress, to proceed, and to make more, buy more, consume more. While that societal trend is in itself questionable, there is no doubt that not making progress or working towards goals leads to a very lonely, dull, and ultimately unfulfilled life.

I’ve gone through the following little things that stood out to me. If you identify with any of the following cases, there’s a good chance you’re standing still.

Laziness to Leave the House

I live alone, and to fill up my time, I’ve set up multiple activities for myself. I’m allowed to work from home, but lately I’ve made a concerted effort to go to office – which is stupidly close by the way. I have a dance class and the office gym to go to, with the motivation being to lose weight and become healthier.Megan Fox - Leaving House | Standing Still - Appreciating | Thorough and Unkempt

The problem arises when I don’t want to go to those places – when I don’t want to get up and leave the house and go to a class or a meeting or a friend’s place. This laziness is both a cause and effect of a rigidity in the body, where the muscles are clenched and stressed. It tires the body out and affects the mind, and in it, like a deadly parasite, the laziness becomes self-sustaining.

Laziness to Self Sustain

In that vein, the self-sustaining laziness, ironically, stops me sometimes from sustaining myself. Too lazy to cook, but also too lazy to go downstairs and eat at a cheap joint. Solution? Throw money at it, and order in.

Too lazy to wash the dishes, so let the kitchen fester and breed illness. Too lazy to do laundry so let it pile up.

I’ve been through it, and only when it got really bad did I get shocked into action, and so I cleaned. An obscene amount of force is required to shake the cobwebs out of one’s head when laziness becomes regular.

Standing Still while Going Somewhere

Once I was headed to a class, and had been walking to the bus stop. Slowly, I stopped. I blinked. What happened? Nothing. I just stopped. Why?

That was the incident that inspired this article. At the moment, I was acutely aware of tension in my shoulders and arms. It was the rigidity of laziness, making me stop and just bob back and forth unable to form a thought.Cyanide and Happiness comic - Force Quit | Standing Still - Appreciating | Thorough and Unkempt

Keep in mind that this incident lasted all of maybe ten seconds – certainly not more than that.

Still it is definitely a warning sign if you hang, like old Windows OS used to do. Speaking of which…

Shutting Down

Standing Still - Appreciating | Thorough and UnkemptYes, it is a computer analogy, for a good reason. When you get used to standing still, it reduces your work potential. You get tired quicker, annoyed quicker and frustrated quicker. Eventually, if your sleep cycle is not correct, or you don’t eat correctly, you have a breakdown.

I call my breakdown a shutdown because it takes the form of sleep. I fall asleep early in the evening, and sleep for anywhere from 10 to 13 hours (The record is 16 hours). The next day, I wake up a little sore but refreshed and ready to work.

It’s fine to occasionally shutdown if it doesn’t interfere with your life (it is important to rest) – but if it happens too often, or if it takes precedence over your normal work and life, then it’s a red flag for serious issues that you might want to get checked out.


 

Bottom line is this – you don’t have to give in to a hectic lifestyle. If you’re content with yourself and your situation, then that’s fine. However, there’s a big difference between being content and being lazy – if you find that any of the four signs apply to you, it might be an issue of motivation, and not fulfillment.

What do you think? Do you shed the hectic environment of the world? Do you have issues with motivation? Leave a comment below and let me know.

Thank you for reading. If you liked this article, check out the previous Appreciating, Use Cases of the Indian Ego.

Use Cases of the Indian Ego

Appreciating 2016-02-18 – Talking about the Indian Ego, entitlement, its possible causes, and the youth movement against it.

Are Indians fragile? Are we special snowflakes? Is the Indian Ego too big for its own good? What is it about Indians in their 20s and 30s that makes them think so highly of themselves?

Note: I’m going to sound very holier-than-thou in this article.

There is a trend seen with a good portion of our country’s population – a trend of entitlement and self-importance. If you’re confused or already annoyed by what I’m insinuating, let me clarify – “Tu Jaanta Hai Mai Kaun hoon?“* Continue reading “Use Cases of the Indian Ego”

4 Primary Reasons to Talk | Appreciating

Appreciating 2016-02-12 – Talking about the primary reasons to talk, its purposes and its benefits – put down in 4 reasons.

Primary reasons to talk – t­his seems like I’m reaching, right? That I’ve run out of content to talk about? Well, no. This article is intended to serve two purposes. One, to dispel the act of taking the power of speech for granted, and two, to help children and young adults, as well as people who have difficulty speaking, understand the reasons to invest time in the skill of speaking.

Every week I take a concept or event so I can say good things about it. Even negative aspects can be helpful sometimes. Welcome to Appreciating. Continue reading “4 Primary Reasons to Talk | Appreciating”

6 Reasons To Make Mistakes | Appreciating

Appreciating 2016-02-04 – Talking about making mistakes and how they’re okay and even beneficial to you – put down in 6 reasons.

Mistakes shall be referred to as “mitsakes” for the purpose of this article. This is for the exercise of teaching myself that not everything needs to be perfect and I’m allowed grammatical and other mistakes.

Every week I take a concept or event so I can say good things about it. Even negative aspects can be helpful sometimes. Welcome to Appreciating.

It is borderline shameful how we scare and belittle each other for making mitsakes. It is even more shameful when we espouse the virtues of making mitsakes but immediately chastise each other for making them. It is because of these paradoxical statements that we confuse and alienate people, especially children.

The realization that you can in fact mess up, therefore, needs to come from the self. Well done on taking a step in the right direction and looking up an article like this. Continue reading “6 Reasons To Make Mistakes | Appreciating”